TarotHunter’s Salt Rounds:

  • You don’t believe in “happily ever after” and as a result find yourself alone and lonely. You can either change your perceptions so you’ll be more open to potential relationships or make your antisocial grumpiness work for you by gaining insights and knowledge easily missed if one is distracted by a relationship.
  • You’re resisting moving on to the next phase of your life because you don’t want to do it alone. Unfortunately, many of our greatest personal epiphanies occur when we are in solitude.
  • You fear that your lack of financial resources and impoverished lifestyle limit your social interactions. Is it that others judge you poorly for your socioeconomic status, or that you’re projecting your insecurities onto the world?

Tarot Hunter’s Salt Rounds:

  • If you were suddenly gifted/won all the money you could ever need would it make you truly happy?
  • Weighing out good intentions and beneficence like coins on a scale is unlikely to bring emotional satisfaction.
  • Perhaps to find true happiness and emotional satisfaction we need to be as generous with ourselves as we are with our money. Donating cash is always beneficial, but to volunteer one’s time and energy is truly giving.

Tarot Hunter’s Silver Bullets:

  • Sometimes finding satisfaction in work has less to do with salary and more to do with the pride of a job well done.
  • Learning new skills can be their own reward but remember the saying “work to live, don’t live to work”.
  • Consider how much more valuable our wealth, our possessions, our “stuff” becomes when we’ve worked hard to achieve them.

Tarot Hunter’s Silver Bullets:

  • Always being the giver and nurturer can be exhausting and deplete your resources.  Asking for and receiving help and support is not a sign of weakness
  • Even those who seem to be poor in material resources can still offer succor and aide. Your value to a charitable institution is not solely defined by financial status. 
  • Sometimes accessing the resources to which you are entitled can be tricky.  Seek assistance from someone who is familiar with the system and can provide insights and guidance.

Hidden Realm 6 of PentaclesHidden Realms Queen of Swords

Looking at the 6 of Pentacles with its abundant and autumnal imagery, I was struck by the fact that one prevailing attitude when I was a child was that there was never enough.  Looking at the apple trees blessing us with an abundance of fruit, I realized we didn’t baskets let alone trees.  We were often forced to move from an apartment because we were unable to pay rent.  I remember the most humiliating experiences were when I was sent grocery shopping and didn’t have the cash to pay for everything at the register.  For an adult that may be embarrassing.  For a 10 year old child it was excruciatingly, piercingly painful.  I still remember the humiliation of having to select items to return while the other folks on line stared, grumbled and glared.  I always swore I would never find myself in that situation again.  And yet in many ways, here I am.

It’s not about being unwilling to share or being stingy, it’s about feeling that I just don’t have it.  I would love to be able to help out others but that’s just not possible right now.  I also find it difficult to ask for help from others.  Being on the receiving end of charity stirs up those old emotions and leaves me feeling like a beggar.

I think the Queen of Swords is who I became as a result of some of these childhood experiences.  She is the intellectual, rather unemotional shell with which I surrounded myself.  She may not be the true me at my deepest core but she is the persona I adopt to adapt to that situation.  What makes me laugh is that the smirk on her face tells me she knows this.  She knows me better than I do.  This is also the part of me that forces me to face the truth; who cuts away the bullshit.

The combination of these two cards tells me that my childhood poverty and my preferred method of dealing with the world (intellectualization, rationalization, etc.) have combined to convince me that I don’t care about money.  I don’t need money.  It’s know important to me.  In reality it is very important to me.  Not that I need a lot of money but I need to feel secure and grounded.  My childhood had some very gypsy-like moments as we were forced to move around because we couldn’t afford the rent in our apartment.  As a result I often felt as though I lived on a fault-line.  You never knew when things was going to be some upheaval.

I think the Queen of Swords is also letting me know that I need to get to the truth of how I want my relationship with money to be.  I need to be honest with myself and realistic about how much money I need, what I’m willing to do to earn money and how much influence I want it to have in my life.

Ghosts & Spirits Queen of Swords

Interesting.  The first reaction I had to these cards was that I’m haunted by my lack of a social life and it causes me to wail in sorrow.  Okay, that’s a bit melodramatic but not necessarily inaccurate.  I have friends but with the way my life is right now I don’t have much opportunity for socializing.  This does cause  me to gnash my teeth in frustration.  I feel so isolated and out of the loop that I’m starting to avoid people because I’m insecure and feeling as thought my social skills are atrophying.

Taking a peek at the LWB I see that Lisa Hunt interprets this card as symbolizing harmony and abundance.  That also fits into some of what haunts me right now – my life is not exactly overflowing with harmony and abundance.  In fact quite often I feel very much like the banshee on the Queen of Swords – shrieking and wailing in sorrow.

However I cannot focus on the darkness for very long.  I know it exists and I do enjoy the occasional wallow in it but (much to my surprise) I seem to have a very strong optimistic streak in my makeup.  That means I try to put the most positive spin on things I can.  Looking at these cards I can see their message can also be telling me that if I want to bring abundance and harmony into my life (so that it will stop haunting me) I need to use my wits and listen to the truth.  It’s time to stop hoping and dreaming and face the harsh truth.

The Banshee/Queen of Swords speak the truth and cuts through the bullshit no matter how painful that might prove.  There are several areas in my life right now that I know are not going to play out the way I would like.  If that’s the case then I need to make alternative plans otherwise I’ll continue to be haunted while harmony and abundance elude me.

Pagan Cats Ace of Pentacles

 

The reversed 7 of Wands tells me that it’s okay to let my guard down; be less defensive. Instead of getting my back up and hissing at folks, I might find it more helpful to relax a bit and be less aggressive. Of course that may be easier said than done. I learned the hard way that it’s best to prepare for the worst even as I hope for the best.

The reversed Ace of Discs (repeated from yesterday) is also reminding me that I can’t move forward and manifest new prosperity until I released this defensive posture. It is blocking me from moving forward and focusing on new projects. If I want to work on prosperity and abundance then I can’t funnel all my energies into holding on to old patterns, old defensive habits. I’m not a porcupine and need to stop behaving as one.

I see my message today as reminding me that if I keep clinging to outdated and worn patterns and responses then I can’t create new ones. I can’t build new prosperity and abundance in my life if I’m clinging to a scarcity mentality. I can’t keep blocking out the world to protect what I have and believe I’ll be able to manifest anything new. I won’t be able to fit it past the blockades and defenses I’ve built.

Wow! What a scary thought – tearing down my defenses and baring myself to the world. I’m not sure if I can do it but I have to give it a try.

Fairy Lights Tarot Emperor Fairy Lights High Priestess

 

The Emperor crossed by The High Priestess – so does this mean my inner empire building is crossed by my inner temple guardian? Nah, that’s a bit too glib (although not necessarily inaccurate). The Emperor represents the benefits of being in control, in charge, the head honcho. It also represents the responsibility and obligations that go along with such power. For a great ruler, it’s not merely about satisfying your own personal needs and goals. It’s also about caring for those who follow you, protecting those who are weaker than you and ensuring that the powerful don’t trod upon the peasants. How sad that we have so few leaders who actually embody this archetype in its most positive aspects.

The High Priestess is the guardian of the hidden mysteries. She knows the way but may choose not to give you directions. She is able to look into your soul and determine whether you’re ready to peer behind the veil. She can read you like a book. This can be a huge responsibility because if she allows somehow who is unready or unworthy to see what lies beyond, it might cause damage to that person’s psyche. It might be too much for her to assimilate or she might use the knowledge acquired in negative ways.

So The Emperor is letting me know that if I want to build something stable and solid in my life, I need to remember that it will require responsibility, determination and steadfastness. He’s also reminding me that everything comes with a price. The more concrete and grounded things gets, the more rooted you become, the less mobile and flexible you can be. As we acquire things, responsibilities and stature, we are less able to maneuver quickly and make changes.

The High Priestess reminds me that sometimes spiritual knowledge and enlightenment can be blocked by having too many things, too much stuff. When we are too stable, too set and too grounded it can be difficult to make the necessary changes to acquire knowledge and see beyond the veil. It may be a reminder that focusing too much on stuff, having things and building a stable foundation, I may also discover that my spiritual work gets sidetracked. These two areas in life may not be mutually exclusive but it requires a lot of effort to balance between the two.

I had an interesting experience this week.  While doing a reading about prosperity, I drew 3 cards that appeared for me at various points this month.  All 3 also appeared during Readers Studio – 2 in a reading for me and 1 in a reading for my foundation partner.  The next day I asked the cards what I was ignoring about prosperity and drew The World (Gaia) which also appeared for me at Readers Studio. That made me explore the deeper message these cards might have for me.

The three cards that appeared in a reading for me were the King of Wands, Knight of Cups and The World.  I drew them as part of my Whole Person Profile Reading during James Wanless’ workshop at Readers Studio.  In fact they were the only cards I drew in their respective suits.  I was using Joanna Powell Colbert’s Gaian Tarot at the time so they were portrayed as the Elder of Fire, Explorer of Water and Gaia.  This makes me think that part of who I am right now is impacting by prosperity and my relationship to it.

Like a lot of people who come from a poor family, I have a very complicated relationship with money and prosperity.  On the one hand I try to act like I’m above such mercenary, mundane concerns and that I don’t need a lot of money to be happy.  I tend to have what Richard Dreyfus’ character in Jaws referred to as “that working class hero crap”.  On the other hand, I like having some extra money.  The past few years have shown me that I don’t need as much money as I once thought I did.  However, it is obvious that some source of income is always needed.

Considering that during the Whole Person Profile Reading, these cards were connected with enlightenment, emotional nature and Yin energies I wonder if these are the pathway through which I will discover prosperity and what it means to me?  Of course this is a fairly rhetorical question because I’m the only one who can truly answer it but I often find if I put the questions out there to the Universe, I will draw the cards or find insights that provide the answers I seek.  I do think there is a connection between who I am as a Whole Person and my relationship to prosperity.  I also think these cards are guideposts along the way.  It will be fun to see where they take me next.

COTD – 5 of Pentacles R (Fey & Gendron)

 

Looking at the images on both these cards, I do not get the traditional message of financial hardship or physical want.  In fact on the Fey 5 of Pentacles I get a sense of keeping the wolf at bay.  The figures are snuggled inside a shelter with a golden, glowing orb hovering overhead while a large, dark, shadowy figure hovers outside.  On the Gendron 5 of Pentacles a nude woman and a shadowy nude woman seem to be worshipping 5 pentacles embedded in the trunk of a tree.  The pentacles seem vague and shadowy too, as though they do not truly exists.  Are these cards suggesting that the security and solidness I believe exists around me is in reality an illusion?

If I wanted to get all physical with the issue (meaning quantum physics), I suppose that could be true.  I’ve read about theories that propose that nothing is actually solid; that we are all vibrating particles that intersect at various points but do not hold concrete existence (or at least that was my understanding).  It reminds me of the puzzler about a tree falling in the woods – if no one is there to hear it does it make a sound.  My brain says ‘of course it makes a sound” but if in reality someone needs to be there to perceive the sound in order for it to manifest itself, then I’m not so sure.

So on some level this card is about manifesting the illusion or perception into reality.  If the illusion is one of poverty and want, then that is what we manifest.  If, however, the illusion is one of warmth, comfort and solidity then that is what is manifested for us.  A friend and I have been talking about scarcity mentality lately.  We both experienced childhoods that involved lots of down time on the fiscal front – lots of scrimping and saving and very little left for anything beyond the barest of essentials.  What we both have experienced is how we still react the same way now, even when that type of scarcity is unlikely.  I’ve heard the expression “shaking your security tree”, well anything that even remotely smacks of poverty or fiscal hard times sends me into a hoarding tizzy.  I feel like  squirrel storing up nuts against the hard times ahead.  It also makes it very difficult for me to share with folks.  I can sometimes experience bouts of generosity and give things away but more often I cling to them like Daffy Duck in an old Bugs Bunny cartoon shouting “mine, mine, mine”.  I love the sense I feel when I have given something to someone they will truly enjoy.  It makes me feel warm and fuzzy whereas clinging to it (when I no longer want or need it) makes me feel like a bloated tick.

Thinking about this card today I realize that although I am experiencing some fiscal challenges right now, we are not at a poverty crisis mode.  I may not be able to splurge but I can still allow myself the occasional treat.  And we are both (hubby and I) working towards improving the situation somewhat.  So how I handle this is up to me.  I can either allow myself to feel the golden glow and security that is available or I can focus all my energies on that shadowy figure in the window and worry about him getting me.  It’s my mindset that needs to change in order to improve the situation.

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